Pictures
New Robbie Savage Figurine
Beckblamia Continues
Penalties with David Beckham
Wanted: Euro 2004 Robber
Heskey and Rooney Attend Premiere
Rooney Reminds The World That He’s A Scouser
Thai PM Arrives At Anfield
The Heskeylator
Freddie Ljungberg Is A Girl Shocker!
Rooney and Jeffers At Rooney’s Birthday
Martin Keown Unshaved!
Arsenal Get New Champions League Sponsors
Spurs Physio Blamed For Rise In Treatments
Only Fools and Chelski
Where's Wally?
Chelski 2003/04 Kit
Seaman’s New Keeper Strip
Scousers Back To Work Scheme
End Of Season Pictures...
Arsenal Words Of Support
RisdalePlan
Sunderland Credit Card
Liverpool Anti-War Protest
Liverpool's Mickey Mouse Cup
Scotland Team Photo 2002

England manager Sven Goran Eriksson spots a turd on the England training pitch with which he replies
"Who's sh*t on the pitch?"
Heskey replies
"I am Boss, but I'm good in the air"

Q) What do Wayne Rooney and Posh Spice have in common?
A) They're both f**king good footballers!

Gerrard Houllier takes the players out to a fancy restaurant for a team building exercise because morale was at an all time low.
He calls the waiter over and starts order the food.
He goes through the starters no problem. "What would Sir like for the main course?" the waiter asks old Pickled Egg Eyes, "I'll have the Beef" replied Houllier.
"OK Sir, what about your vegetables?" the waiter added, "They can have the same!", said Houllier.

Portsmouth are being predicted to stay in the premership for three seasons.
Autumn,Winter,Spring

England manager Sven Goran Eriksson told David Beckham that he was thinking about playing him in the next england friendly but may pull him off at half time.
"Fantastic" said David I usually only get an orange!

Q) What do Sunderland and George Michael have in common?
A) They are always scoring in the wrong end.

A mackem and a geordie were walking along the beach when one of them kicked a bottle and a genie popped out. the genie granted them one wish each only.
The geordie asked for a 100ft wall to be erected all around newcastle to keep the "mackems" out of his beloved toon!
The genie answered, "your wish has been granted".
He turned to the mackem, "your turn", to which the mackem replied,
"Now fill the bastard with water."

Phil Thompson went to the Liverpool Xmas party last season dressed as a pumpkin.
Come midnight he still hadn't turned into a coach.

Q) Why is David Seamen queer?
A) Because he has 10 bums in front of him and 10 thousand pricks behind

West Ham are magic. Watch them disappear in to the first division...

Q) Why does the river mersey run through Liverpool?
A) If it walked it would get mugged.

A man without a ticket scales the walls of Wembley to watch a cup final, about 5 minutes before the KO he looks around for a spare seat, he sees one next to an old bloke. He asks the old bloke if the seat is taken, 'no' says the man, 'it was my wife's but she died, we have been watching the cup final every year for the past 35 years, same seats every year, sit down you can have the seat'. After a short while the man says to the old bloke 'did you not have any friend or relative who would have like your wife's seat', 'Oh yes' said the old man, 'but they are all at her funeral'

Steve McLaren was wheeling his shopping trolley across the supermarket car park when he noticed an old lady struggling with her bags of shopping. He stopped and asked, "Can you manage dear?" to which the old lady replied, "no way you got yourself into this mess, don't ask me to sort it out!"

A Little Welsh lad is practicing his free kicks at Derby. He has one< of those portable walls which he moves around to change the angle so he can shoot from different areas of the field. He takes 50 kicks at goal, everyone finds the back of the net. John Gregory is watching in the stands and walks down to talk to the young man.
"How old are you son?" asks the hair dying County Boss
"13" Replies the young fellow.
"Well I am very impressed with your shooting" continues the raven
headed manager, "and I must say if you continue in this vein of form, when you get older you may be good enough to play for the Derby 1st team"
"F*ck off" said our hero "it's bad enough being Welsh"

Q. Why should you never run over a Liverpool supporter when they are on a bike?
A. It's probably your bike.

Q: Why were Sunderland the strongest team in the premiership?
A: Because they had been propping up all the other teams all season!

Q: How many Manchester Utd. fans does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Three. One to change the bulb, one to buy the "1997 lightbulb changing" commemorative T-shirt and video, and one to drive the other two back to Torquay.

Two boys are playing football in the park when one of them is attacked by a rottweiler. Thinking quickly, his friend rips a plank of wood from a fence, forces it into the dog's collar and twists it, breaking the dog's neck. All the while, a newspaper reporter who was taking a stroll through the park is watching. He rushes over, introduces himself and takes out his pad and pencil to start his story for the next edition. He writes, "Manchester City fan saves friend from vicious animal." The boy interrupts: "But I'm not a City fan." The reporter starts again: "Manchester United fan saves friend from horrific attack." The boy interrupts again: "I'm not a United fan either." The reporter asks: "Who do you support, then?" "Liverpool," replies the boy. So the reporter starts again: "Scouse b*****d kills family pet"

David James is so distraught after his latest blunder that he decides to end it all. He walks straight out of Upton Park and throws himself down in front of a number 9 bus. Luckily, it passes under him.

Q: Why do NASA send their astronauts to train at Old Trafford?
A: It's the only place in the world with no atmosphere!

A Bolton fan walks into a pub with his dog just as the football scores come on the TV. The announcer says that Bolton have lost 3-0 and the dog immediately rolls over on its back, sticks its paws in the air and plays dead. "That's amazing," says the barman. "What does he do when they win?"
The Bolton Fan scratches his head for a couple of minutes and finally replies: "I dunno.... I've only had the dog for eight months."

Glenn Roeder was caught speeding on his way to Upton Park today.
"I'll do anything for 3 points", he said when questioned.

The Fire brigade phones Glen Hoddle in the early hours of Sunday
morning...
"Mr Hoddle sir, White Hart Lane is on fire!"
"The cups man! Save the cups!" cries Glenn.
"Uh, the fire hasn't spread to the canteen yet, sir."

Q: How does Stan Collymore change a lightbulb?
A: He holds it in the air, and the world revolves around him.
Q: How do you confuse a Manchester United fan?

A: Show him a map of Manchester.